Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Thinking again.


Why do I feel like this is going to be my last couple of years?  Is the specter of doom hanging over my head or am I just having another series of anxiety attacks?  Next Wednesday I’m going to be 54, and the way it works in men,  that means that the first two thirds of my life are over.  I just feel like I have to do something great before I die.  Create something that’s going to be remembered forever, something that’s going to say I was here and I was an artist.  I’ve been working on my artwork and it’s OK, but nothing really strikes me as fantastic.  I just feel like I don’t have enough time, I mostly work and when I get home the only thing that I can do is just defuse the stress.  It’s funny with all the distractions in the world it’s almost impossible to stay focus on your projects.  I can see why a lot a famous artist’s just seal themselves away so they can internalize and get their work out there.  How does a low middle class man get his mind sealed off and get the juices flowing some that the art can come screaming out into existence? I just have to work out a way to concentrate on my work,
I need to get off the grid, 
I need to unplug. 

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